Emptiness


Its senseless , crazy , stupid i know but I crave for something a little more loud , something with a little pain , something with a lot of insanity and someone with shit loads of deepness ( kiki don’t kill me) , I know however bad it would be its gonna be better than this emptiness .

So i have been walking for a very long time but never lost sight of the where and the what and the who, but this time around I have been walking but I have nothing in sight no one to reach out to,no where to go..i am just walking rather peacefully and honestly this silence is freaking me out …its echo is deafening .

Need my stupid emotion back need some noise….

Back to The Future!

Its one of those times when you want to believe in time machines , a time when u so desire u have one parked in your garage, when u want to believe that back to future was not just a sci-flick and Dr Brown was ur beer buddy.

For the longest I didn’t want to see what is instored for me in the coming months or years ,knowing it kind of took the spice out of it right ? Also I think I am a dreamer who likes to build my future in my own dreams and thoughts and I love it when my dreams come true and almost not fret if they don’t, if something does not work out I move on weave another dream. But sometimes the spice becomes too much to handle and you want it to be as bland as it could be, and that’s what I want now.

This time I don’t just wanna dream, I wanna know what’s coming my way, may be because at this point in time the stakes are too high and almost everything in future depends on what future would be , what I could be would depend on what I would be .

ebay, do you have any time machines on Sale?

DAD I LOVE YOU

Recently I met three friends who had recently lost their respective Dad’s. I got this unexplainable, painful feeling something which was full of fear, guilt, insecurity, love and immense respect. May be I should not be writing this but well I am so please take it as a wake up call for those who are fortunate enough to have their fathers around than as a sympathy note to those who have gone through the most excruciating pain of their lives because nothing can put them at ease.

Even though none of them spoke about it openly and all of them tried to not show their emotion and put up a rather brave face ,I could probably feel the pain which was nothing if compared to their's but still was piercing enough for me to realize one thing.

One’s Dad is probably the most important Man in his /her life and even though we meet many remarkable men in our life who can come in any form; brothers, friends, bosses, husbands, mentors and others but nothing can replace what one feels or should feel for his/her dad. I know most of us know this in the back of our minds but then that’s the back of our mind and that’s no place for Dad. He’s got to be up ahead in the front seat.

Come to think of it he is the man who has shaped the very us from inside and a little from the outside, yes I know for some of us what our fathers did is a distant memory because we moved out of our homes to make a man out of ourselves but remember that it was Dad who kicked our butt and probably said it for the first time “Grow Up, Be a Man, You Are Not A Kid Any More”. Our journey to be a man started from this comment of his and not with our first kiss or first smoke as we want to believe.

We could have turned in to kleptomaniacs if he wouldn’t have slapped us hard when we tried picking up that money lying on the Tv to play video games, we might have turned in to a junky if dad was smoking up all the time and gave us our first joint and said nothing beats marijuana son or may be a even a women abuser if dad didn’t love mom the way he did, for some reason he did it all right till we grew up and became opinionated.

And that’s important it was we who grew up not him he didn’t grow old, he is still the same guy who bravely faced our Math’s teacher after your super performance (read Crap), he is still the guy who knocks of at 10 while our life starts at midnight, he still likes his morning chai and newspaper while we have started having random whiskey mornings. He thinks of us, calls us, talks about us every single day while most of us wait for his birthday or fathers day.

Everything he did or everything he said or didn’t say somewhere impacted our life and we need to remind ourselves of it every single day.

Call up don’t wait for fathers day, he is waiting , if you have nothing to say just say I love u …

Hey God

Hey God

How’s it goin up there or well down there or well everywhere , so you know I am not much of a believer , don’t mind it but I guess most people I know are not. I don’t even know why I am writing this cause it’s like writing to a ghost well even ghosts exist..

So take it as a compliment I say because believe it or not you made me do it. So all this while I use to fight with mom and say that probably god was an alien or just a pigment of ones imagination and she used to fight back, I won most times cause I am good at arguments, but yesterday you made your point .

I felt the need, the need to believe that there is someone who is kind of running the show it was not even like i suddenly believed that u exist but a part of me wanted u to exist, exist as may be super man who could make things happen, turn, twist, move around but get the job done and be the last man standing.

But I got to say if u do exist you are one smart guy/girl/animal/alien/power cell I mean u got your way through me, hit me where u know will hurt the most.

Now that uev proved your point of existence and all please go ahead and work on my prayer, it’s important, you know it is, and if you make this work, boy u got one assured fan if ever u create your own blog.

And ya I am going to do what I can do best, give my best…u take care of the rest..Please be what you want me to believe you are.

Take care…Be there….

Nothing is Everything....

What’s wrong I asked and she said ohh nothing

Nothing is not nothing when she is everything

Nothing is important when its happiness you wanna bring

Happiness is what you feel when all you wanna do is sing

And by jooo I so wanna sing when I hear my phone ring

I know if it rings there is magic and may be its time to cling

And if we cling than this life will rock and we shall swing

Swing we shall through time through ages cause its not just another fling

Cause if it is one of those it will hurt more than a bee sting

And I so feel like being born for you like a needle for a string

So you know this nothing is everything…..

DAWN

There’s nothing like chilled breeze hitting your face, kings of Leon blowing your eardrums, ambition burning up your brain and thoughts warming up your heart, first long run this winter ….its like nothing absolutely nothing can stop you now, you don’t feel no pain , you don’t loose breath .. just the warm rush in your head ,its just you and your belief that will run you through this year in to the new dawn..
What a start for 2011 new pad, super ambition and the angel out of the box of chocolate fame.for once life seems sorted no muck ,no malice, ruthless honesty is the new name of the game, and woho what a game …its time to rise and shine baby , its time to be a MAN and DO THE RIGHT THING…

In Pursuit of Happiness

In Pursuit of Happiness

I am sitting here in Mumbai stunned at what just happened, some one said life is a box of chocolates you never know what comes out next , but no one like ever thought that an angel will come out of a box of chocolates when all you expected was well another chocolate.

So this angel has been walking around mowing all the scum in my life, burning all destructive and vicious elements around and kicking hard on my sweet non existent butt and telling me to WAKE UP and get my act together.

Well my dear Angel I am gonna do just that , get hold of my even paced peaceful life of which I have almost no complaints but also of which I am not very proud of like its no Hero Stuff. I am going to turn it around , push it to the next level and create a tale with liberal dozes of, ambition ,courage , passion, emotion and complication and take it to the next level , to a place where you arrive and you feel like o well UEV ARRIEVED .

I am going to create a fable of which I am proud of, which spells happiness and which I can recite to my grand kids when I am old and bored.

So now that that’s out of way cut me some slack and let me go and be the man I always wanted to be. And the Angel of the box of chocolates fame well I will talk about her when the time is right…….